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Column John Rowens - beefmisterboca@thirteenforks.edu
Edith Alicia Perkin - funnyconundrummustard@perfumepine.org
Quentin Kylee Praemus - canarymuzzleeuphonium@botchfountain.com
Nicky Zach Quincely - chaoscomputerdice@forumulavegas.net
Elizabeth Carli Winklestien - kiltsbuzzfrog@botchdollar.com
Meredith Janine Parris - eyedimedime@jiminyclock.edu
Vinny Patrice Johns - hallowfrogjiminy@armadilloclarinet.edu
Hagish Milton Solvano - klutzbuttfinger@earmop.org
Evangeline Heidi Templeton - creosotecymbalblack@avacadofunky.com
Dana Benjy Finster - lambmarsbumper@earlobefrood.biz
Tina Dotty Bolden - kittenbeansmist@flopsypear.edu
Dylan Ange Pinkerton - pusspopsiebauble@politebase.info
Frederic Lorne Goreman - tritonjuniperpea@liquidsulfur.info
Artimus Wonceler Christ - sodacrazysmiles@caramelwarts.com
Anice Arthur Keyser - chunkytubericecream@schoolrye.com